@MIZZOU ASKS YOU

Forever Friends

@Mizzou readers share stories of lasting friendships made at MU …

I began my Mizzou educational experience in 1984 as a member of the Women’s Track Team. It was during that time that I made five of the closest friends I will ever have. We all ran the same events, and some combination of the six of us ran on the 4 x 800-meter relay team. In 1994, while the youngest of my friends was still competing for the University, we made a pact that we would meet once a year for a reunion. Our first reunion revolved around the track meet Penn Relays. We have kept our pact, and in October 2004, we celebrated our 10-year reunion.

Each year, we pick a place in the United States and meet for an extended weekend. These reunions are the highlight of my entire year; my five friends and I are bonded for life. We have celebrated three marriages, the birth of seven children and what seems like a lifetime of friendship. There are very few words that can describe the depth of our friendship.

We all have very unique personalities and come from different racial, social, economic and religious backgrounds. We live throughout the country in the states of Missouri, Kansas, Illinois, Georgia and New York. Yet none of those things matters. We share the common bond of a deep love and admiration for one another. Had we not all chosen to attend Mizzou, we never would have met and learned the true meaning of friendship.

— Tracey Murray, BSW ’89, MSW ’90

I have so many found memories of my educational experiences at MU. Dr. B. Charles Leonard was one very special adviser to me. He was a wonderful teacher, educator and my mentor when I was a doctoral candidate. Charley was instrumental in developing the Individual Guided Education (IGE), and he designed workshops for use throughout Missouri and other states. He was a fine gentleman and a superb educator. His wife, Kathryn, also was an outstanding elementary teacher and fine woman. Dr. Leonard passed away and will be missed by all.

— Max Garoutte, M Ed ’71, Ed SP ’74, EdD ’80

Misery loves company.

OK, so calling the J-School “miserable” would be an unfair overstatement. But the truth is that working long hours at the Missourian, juggling a full course load and functioning as a normal college student tended to be overwhelming at times.

It was my junior year, and I was in my J-306 news editor’s office at the Missourian; it was the semester I was going to be a reporter. In walked Laura Allen. She had come to request the Hallsville beat right as my editor assigned it to me. Leaving with the assignment of covering Boonville, Laura was sure that I stole from her what she rightly deserved. I was convinced that she was pretentious and someone with whom I would never want to spend time socially.

That short encounter, fortunately, did not set the tone. Sitting next to each other in an anthropology class that semester made us “insta-friends” (just add a mocha from Memorial Union!) We were inseparable in the newsroom, during J-306 lectures and on most weekends.

Now living in Rochester, NY, and Boulder, Colo., we still try to see each other once a year, talk on the phone about once a week and e-mail each other at work probably more than we should.

— Heather Werle, BJ ’01, and Laura Allen Hammond, BJ ’01

Although I was headed for the J-school, I got involved on an extra-curricular basis with theatre during my sophomore year. A friend who was a theatre major took me to the Green Room in the Fine Arts Building. There was plenty of off-stage drama there, believe me! I was intrigued, and after seeing the fabulous production of The Fantasticks in 1963, I started working backstage (and, of course, hung out with the theatre gang at the Heidelberg after rehearsals). There I met Faith Salisbury Williams, who is still my best friend (she was dating a theatre techie). At the same time, I met Jim Zvanut, BA ’65, who played one of the fathers in Fantasticks; he, too, is still a very close friend.

The three of us still share an intense love of theatre (Jim taught acting and directing for many years and ran several theatres). Faith and I had a special treat in January 2002 when we were able to get tickets in the front row for the next-to-last performance of The Fantasticks in New York, after its unequaled run of more than 40 years.

This experience has made me believe that when you’re starting out as an independent adult, the people you meet who share common interests (and a booth at the ’Berg) are those you’re most likely to stay in touch with across years and miles.

— Susan Blair, BJ ’66

Back in 1993, the Universidad Autonoma de Guadalajara hosted a group of students who were coming to Mexico to study Spanish. It was a large group from Mizzou, about 25 students. My family hosted four of the young women who came with the group.

At that time I had already graduated from college and was working at the local paper located on the university’s campus. I had just come back from an exchange program at the University of Oklahoma, and I knew I was coming back to the states; I just didn’t know when or how.

One of the girls who stayed at my house, Kristine Albright Smith, BA ’91, M Ed ’93, offered to have me come to Missouri and stay with her until I could get accepted to the journalism master’s program. There were a handful of journalism students who came to Guadalajara that year, so they had already sold me on the prestige and reputation of the J-school.

Kristine and two of the other girls who stayed at my house, Lisa Boyer Fajen, BA, BS Ed ’90, and Ellen Reed Fox, BA ’91, MA ’93, were like sisters. I wouldn’t have made it if it weren’t for them and Kris’ family, who became “mom and dad” for me. I came to the states with $500 U.S. dollars, flew to Oklahoma and rode a bus to Rolla where Kristine picked me up. We drove 3 or so hours into Columbia. I was possibly the only foreigner on campus who on her first week kept running into people I knew. The girls, their roommates and their families made sure I had warm clothes and jackets. They made sure I had a bed and that I met key journalism professors (such as Daryl Moen, who became my mentor and friend). In sum, they made it possible for me to succeed, and in the process, we developed a strong family relationship.

Twelve years later, the four of us are still in contact with each other. Kristine’s parents came to my wedding in 1997. She now has three children. I attended both Lisa’s and Ellen’s weddings. Lisa has three children and Ellen has two. Ellen has made trips to see my family back in Guadalajara. My dad and my mom still call them daughters. Whenever I go to Missouri I always stay with one of them — or with another best friend, Tanya Stitt Heath, BJ ’91, daughter of the late Mizzou professor Jim Stitt. Tanya was a bridesmaid at my wedding, and to this day, we remain best friends.

I really wouldn’t know where to start in telling the story of the deep, strong bonds I have with the people I met at Mizzou and what this means to me.

— Claudia Ortega-Lukas, MA ’93

I just threw a baby shower for a dear friend who I’ve known for 11 years. I met her on the fourth floor of Johnston Hall a few days after I moved in as a freshman. Although she was a sophomore, she embraced me, showed me the ropes of campus life and made me feel very welcome. Eleven years later our friendship continues to be strong. Despite graduation, new careers, children and more than 1,500 miles between us (I live in Phoenix, and she’s in St. Louis), we still keep in touch and continue to build upon the friendship we began at Mizzou.

— Monica Burroughs White, BJ ’97

Some of the relationships I developed at Mizzou are the most precious in my life. Through my freshman-year roommate I met the man I decided to marry. Though my roommate and I are not close anymore, I will always remember the friendship that resulted in me finding the man of my dreams. Also through that same roommate, I met a very dear friend. Though she works in Washington D.C. and I work in Kansas City, we still touch base when we can. She has asked me to be part of her wedding one day.

— Marnie Olson, BJ ’00

I went to Mizzou for undergrad and had a great time. I was fortunate enough to always get good grades without an extreme amount of effort, so there was plenty of time for extracurricular activities, and I made the most of it. I have several friends who I am still very close to, and I have great memories. But after graduation, I went to the MU School of Law, and for the first time in my life, was actually challenged and had to study hard. I certainly wasn’t alone; many people in my class were in the same boat as we all struggled to keep our heads above water.

During the first semester, I met another girl in my “section,” and we hit it off right away. We soon became close friends and study partners. By second year, we sat together in almost every class and helped each other fill in the gaps in notes that invariably seemed to occur. By our third and final year, we knew each other like we’d grown up together. We made it through moot court, the final round of finals, celebrated graduation and started studying for the Bar examination.

When it came time to take the trip to Jefferson City to actually take the Bar, we bunked together – rooms being scarce and somewhat pricey for a couple of unemployed, unlicensed lawyers. Somehow, we kept each other sane over those two days (I should say over those two sleepless nights because during the days we were occupied).

Back then, they posted at midnight the list of names of those who passed the Bar on the Supreme Court door, and if you didn’t want to drive to Jefferson City, you could call the clerk to get the results. Not only could you ask if your name was on the list, but you also could ask about others on the list. So when the big day came two months after the test, I first asked if I had passed, and after waiting for what seemed like eternity for the person on the phone to find my name and say, “yes,” I asked about my friend and also got a “yes.” My friend had gone to France for an extended trip right after the Bar exam, and at the time, an international phone call seemed extravagant (this was 20 years ago). So, I sent a telegram, which said, “We both passed – lawdogs forever.” She has it framed in her office to this day.

I have been in Cape Girardeau for 20 years, and my friend practices in Kansas City. We are both proud graduates of the MU Law Class of 1984. Although her name is Cathy Hartnett, she was dubbed “Miss Harriet” by Professor Fratcher during the first semester of Property Law when he couldn’t read the seating chart, and the name has stuck. I have three boys, and they all call her “Aunt Harriet.”

Despite the distance in miles, we manage to visit regularly and have remained very close friends since law school. I consider her my very best friend. I would trust her with my life. Sometimes we go weeks without talking, but then we talk for hours. We got together for an MU football game this fall, but I don’t remember the game because we talked all the way through it.

I think there’s something about going through law school that really bound us together. I know there are several strong friendships in our class, and at our 20th reunion, there were lots of people who I was genuinely glad to see. We studied together, partied together, suffered and celebrated together. “They were the best of times and the worst of times.” I’m just glad that I had the experience.

I should also mention that I met my other “best friend” at Mizzou too. I married him.

— Nancy Hatley Browne, BA ’81, JD ’84

Archives | Comments | Home

SUBSCRIPTIONS
Subscribe | Change Your Address | Unsubscribe

Copyright © 2007 — Curators of the University of Missouri
DMCA and other copyright information.
All rights reserved. An equal opportunity/ADA institution.
Published by the Mizzou Alumni Association
Questions? Comments? E-mail comments@mizzoualumni.org

Last Update: November 15, 2007